LB Says Hi

I'm not sure how we learn to love. Some say it's what we've seen in our lifetime, meaning we reenact the love we've witnessed, meaning, we mimic what we know. If that's true, then I'm doomed.  All my life I've only seen the hardships of relationships. Since I could remember, my mom and dad always were fighting, probably why I'm such an excellent arguer, excellent in the sense that I do it often, not that I'm good at it. All I've known is how a relationship does NOT work, leaving me clueless about what and how a healthy and true relationship should be. I'm not blaming my parents, choosing the wrong person to love should not be something ridiculed, we are humans after all. I am either fated to "love" the way my parents did, or I can choose to change my perception of love altogether: What I want for myself, and what I would've wanted for my parents. I believe that can happen. I have to start by forgetting everything I "kn...

I have a long history with gift-giving. When I was younger, it was harder to give the gifts I truly wanted to give because I usually had no source of income. So, I’d spend a lot of time making gifts. I’d get really creative and decorate picture frames containing memorable moments and bake cookies. Now, I’ve been able to buy gifts that are worth a little more, while still being creative as possible. On Valentine’s Day, I bought my boyfriend Travis a gift card to buy any shoes he wanted. But, it was his gift that I will never forget. After many reservations and then cancelled reservations, he suggested that he cook for me. Now, this may not seem like a big deal to you, but TO ME, it was a huge gesture. Firstly, Travis does not cook — besides packaged saimin, grilled cheese sandwiches and paninis. Still, I cancelled the latest Valentine’s reservation because he was making the effort. Saturday came and Travis began cooking at 4 p.m. I wasn’t allowed to enter the kitchen nor ask que...

Sometimes it’s really hard to believe how long it’s been, because it still feels so fresh. I remember getting that call from Kels. I knew something was wrong. As I was awakened from sleep, I just knew. I was told to sit tight, during the weeks before your death. Being an ocean away made it harder, not because I couldn’t say goodbye, I knew you didn’t want anyone around you when you were ready to go, but because I couldn’t be there to hold your boys and to hug my sister as she came to terms with you leaving. The truth was that none of us knew when you’d actually depart, and even after weeks of bad news, I kept thinking that you’d be better and that the doctors would be wrong. So, you left, before I had a chance to believe it. Tomorrow is the day, and your boys have memorized it well. For them, it came like a slight change in the air, although their lives would be drastically changed forever. Still, the way it happened for them was almost a mystery, as it should be right now. ...